Microsoft Word Grammar Checker Are No Good, Scholar Conclude.

by Jimmy Akin on April 15, 2005

in Curios & Humor

Yes, it true! They are no good. It is bad very checker. They clear everything in this post blog. No green line squiggly. These sentence no verb.

Microsoft, it needs fix grammar checker or ditch. So articles say. I agree with it. I am violates multiple grammar rules herein. Last sentence two main verbs! Yet no squiggly line green still!

Microsoft Word grammar checker creation of Easter Bunny for mankind harm!

GET STORY!

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Hey Jimmy,
Just wanted you to know that I used your post (attributed to you, of course) in my Developmental Writing class. Hope you don't mind!
Tim Peoples

This post brought to you by Bizarro Jimmy!

Let us not neglect their spelling checker:
JABBERWOCKY, corrected by Word
or,
Why You Do Not Want to Trust Automated Checkers
Lewis Carroll
(from Through the Looking-Glass and What Alice Found There, 1872)
`Taws billing, and the smithy toes
Did gyre and gamble in the wage:
All missy were the brogues,
And the mime rats outrage.
"Beware the Jabberwocky, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jujube bird, and shun
The furious Bandersnatch!"
He took his viral sword in hand:
Long time the Manxwomen foe he sought --
So rested he by the Tutu tree,
And stood awhile in thought.
And, as in offish thought he stood,
The Jabberwocky, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffing through the tulle wood,
And burbled as it came!
One, two! One, two! And through and through
The viral blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.
"And, has thou slain the Jabberwocky?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O crablouse day! Callow! Calla!'
He chortled in his joy.
`Taws billing, and the smithy toes
Did gyre and gamble in the wage;
All missy were the brogues,
And the mime rats outrage.

Jar Jar, is that you?

I always disable the automatic spell checking and automatic grammar checking in Word. I can't stand seeing those stupid squiggly lines, especially when it often flags words or phrases where there is nothing wrong with the spelling or grammar.
I much prefer Open Office anyway; it has essentially all the features of Word and Excel, and it's free.

I am a corporate training developer and technical editor by trade, and I use MS grammar checker solely for its entertainment purposes.
When we get new writers or editors the first thing we do is instruct them to disable the grammar checker. Heck, if they can't check their own grammar in the documents and courseware we create, they shouldn't be in this job!
'thann

Allow me to troll post. ;)
Switch from evil M$ Word to WordPerfect! Wordperfect uses Gammatik as the grammer checker. Not perfect, but not evil.

Hmm, a MicroSquash product that completely fails to do what it promises to do and yet annoyingly intrudes on your work.
Anyone but me fail to be surprised by that?
--arthur

I also "love" how the spellchecker recognizes the names of prominent Democratic, but not Republican, politicians!

“Miss Type” should be “mistype” in my last post also…. I think that I will quit while I am behind and writing in non e-prime passive voice.

Wow that was irony - I miss typed colleague in my last post and word’s autocorrect changed it to Colleges… sorry about the confusion.

In regards to the passive voice post – you can adjust the grammar checker so that it does not pick up on such things and yet still selects certain other errors. I would like to set it up so that it flags anything not written in e-prime.
I constantly run into issues with the grammar checker with ‘plural’ vs ‘singular’ when the verb is ambiguous as to the nature.
If you want to do a good prank around the office go into someone’s autocorrect and change a few things… I set up one of my colleges so that every time he typed his name the autocorrect changed it to “Superman.”
Perhaps with all of the errors it should change my name Shibboleth to Sibboleth.

As I read Jimmy's words, I hear a Chinese pidgin accent. Maybe Miscrosoft outsourced their grammar code to 19th century coolies.

Oh, I despise the Word grammar checker! If I want to use the passive voice, by golly, I'll use the passive voice!!

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