A reader writes:
I have a quick question on the Parable of the Sower. It says, "The worries of this life, the deceitfulness of wealth and the desires for other things come in and choke the word, making it unfruitful."
My question is, are Christians allowed to have "desires for other things" besides God? For example, if I strongely desire a wife, is it wrong? I’ve been praying for a wife for years, but this parable convicted me.
The "desires for other things" phrase may be unfamiliar to some because it is found in Mark’s version of the Parable of the Sower, but not in Matthew or Luke’s version, which are better-known.
This phrase need not be an occasion for scrupling, however. It does not mean that desires for things other than God are bad. God himself designed us so that we would desire various things: food, human companionship, respect, love, sex, etc. All of those are goods, and God designed us to desire goods. It’s what motivates us to seek them and thus seek good.
The problem is when we allow desires for temporal goods to crowd out eternal goods. It is not sinful to desire a particular temporal good–such as a wife–but it becomes sinful if one is willing to mortally sin (turn one’s back on God) in order to gain a wife. The same is true of any other temporal good. If we are willing to mortally sin in order to get it then we have fixed our will on it rather than God. The situation is similar if we’re willing to venially sin in order to get it. In that case we’re letting it impede our relationship with God, but we’re not turning away from God to pursue it.
There is nothing wrong with desiring temporal things in addition to God; there is nothing wrong with strongly desiring them. What we have to make sure is that our desires for these things do not lead us into sin. As long as that is the case, there is no problem and the hierarchy of goods is as it should be, with us recognizing the transcendant value of eternal goods over temporal ones.
The balance is struck by Jesus in Matthew 6, where he tells us:
[D]o not be anxious, saying, `What shall we eat?’ or `What shall we drink?’ or `What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek all these things; and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things shall be yours as well. Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be
anxious for itself. Let the day’s own trouble be sufficient for the
day [Matt. 6:31-34].
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